Happy Birthday, Dad!

The day before yesterday was my dad's 100th birthday. I did not allow the fact that he's been dead for 38 years to get in the way of the birthday party I threw for him.

The idea for the party came to me about 5 weeks ago, just as a ‘wouldn’t it be fun’ type of thing. But as the date grew closer I began to realize that, for some reason, this was a very important thing and I HAD to do it.

It felt important that all my kids be at the party, and it was fortunate they all could make it. We decorated the house with Happy Birthday signs and banners, and I got out all the old pictures of him and put them all around, arranging one long row of them on the mantle that showed his life from babyhood through old age. Another row of them was on the piano, and showed a long ago trip from California to Texas with his extended family of grannies, aunts, uncles and countless cousins.

I also printed out some of his Texan sayings (most of them rather crude) and taped them on the walls in various rooms. The kids are familiar with most of these, but it was fun to go around reading them (and for me, remembering him saying them) and laughing.

We burned a CD with some of his favorite songs and some of the music that had come out the year he was born; we played it all evening. I talked to the family a bit about his life and times....since he'd passed on before any of them were born.

It was wild for me to think that when he was born Theodore Roosevelt was president of the United States, the Wright Brothers had taken to the air only 3 years before, the US Postal Service had yet to issue the first postage stamps, Nickolodeons (the five-cent theaters) were the hottest form of popular entertainment, and possessing a car and/or a telephone was a rarity.

So we talked about him, his life and times. We played the CD and enjoyed the songs. Then we had dinner. Later we sang Happy Birthday to him and had cake and ice cream. My son-in-law made us all laugh when he said, "I've never before been to a birthday party for someone who wasn't there....I don’t quite know what to do…..Like…..who blows out the candles?" I decided we ALL did – since we were all his bloodline or beloveds of his bloodline. So we did…. And after that, something quite unexpected and unplanned popped out of my mouth: I told dad he was free to go on into his next life now, if that's what he wanted. Having this just pop out of me really surprised me, as I'd never given a thought to him NOT having moved forward......

As the evening wore on, I became increasingly aware that a ritual was being enacted – this was an ancestor ritual that had needed to be done. It was important -- not just to me, but FOR him, as well. And having done it up good and proper, I felt really happy, and satisfied that I’d done a good job.

Altogether, it was a very interesting evening.

Goodbye, Dad; we'll never forget you!

Blessed Brigid - the Golden Sparkling Flame

Today is the feast of the Brigid, the Holy Woman, whose name means High One, or Exalted One. She was said to be a protector of women in childbirth, and was associated with the welfare of livestock. Her festival, February 1^st, is associated with the lambing season.

In the insular Celtic countries Spring began on this day, which was also referred to as Oimelc (ewe’s milk). The very next day, February 2^nd, was the Christian feast of Candlemas, which was really the church’s observance of the much older feast of Imbolc/ Oimelc/Brigid—a feast of fire and light at a time when the dark of winter is giving way to the light of spring. The baby lambs were born around this time. It was, therefore, a time of new light, new life, new milk, new nourishment. Interestingly, February 3^rd is the feast of a saint with the interesting name of “Blaise,” and is a day when candles are blessed for the liturgical year, and the congregation comes forward to have their throats blessed (for protection against choking) by a priest, who used two candles in an X shape—exactly the shape of Brigid’s Cross—to do this.

Brigid has been honored at this time of year for a very long time, first as Goddess and later as Saint. She was particularly honored by women, whose rituals at this time of year—recorded by folklorists—involved inviting Brigid back to the world to bring her light, warmth, fertility and prosperity. A special bed was prepared for her, and omens of future life and prosperity were taken from the evidence of whether or not she was seen to have arrived and slept in her bed.

There is much fire symbolism in the stories of St. Brigid, and many of these stories are thought to derive from the older, pagan stories of the Goddess Brigid, who was sometimes addressed as the golden, sparkling flame. According to legend, a perpetual fire burned in her precinct at a place later known as Kildare, the Church of the Oak. This fire was tended by 19 priestesses—similar to the Roman national hearth tended by the Vestal Virgins. Like many other holy fires of legend, it was said to burn without producing ash. The 19 priestesses cared for the fire for 19 nights, but it was thought that Brigid herself tended the flame on the 20^th night. When Christianity came to be the religion of the land, it was St. Brigid who was honored and Christian nuns who tended the flame.

Brigid was a triple goddess: she was sometimes said to have two sisters also named Brigid. They they were matron goddesses of healing, of poetry—with which seership was connected—and of crafts, particularly those associated with fire, such as metal-smithing and perhaps pottery. In addition, the legends show Brigid to be associated with that borderlands/ liminality/threshold state that clearly links her to the Otherworlds, including the world of Faery. Her association with these liminal states is shown in her St. Brigid legends by the fact that she was born at sunrise and while her mother was straddling a threshold. It is shown in her Goddess legends by the fact that she was of the Tuatha De Danann, yet married to a Fomorian. Perhaps it is also illustrated by the fact that her cult also straddled two religious traditions, and made an easy transition from Paganisn to Christianity.

Brigid is associated with water as well as fire, and many healing wells are sacred to her throughout the British Isles. Places where water emerges from the Earth are always considered thresholds between the worlds—the Underworld and Middleworld in this case. As a goddess of healing associated with seership and liminal states of being, she is uniquely suited to be the especial Matron Goddess of Faery Healing.

from
Faery Healing: The Lore and the Legacy, Chapter 15